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Friday, February 5, 2010


I´m in love again.

With the internet, that is.

I used to have a school girl crush on this blogger, and now I think I´m full on in love once again. She pointed me towards a new obsession and now I want to be a photographer.

(Insert forehead scrunching)

I want to be a lot of things. Like a person that does more than stare out a window smoking cigarettes with my swivel ashtray in my free time (shut up, can we talk about it later? Moving was stressful).

Little by little I´m catching up with my many other crushes and long time loves. I´ve missed you a lot. I´ve thought about you daily.

Besides having a really cool window to stare out and a whole damn city needing to be spied on with binoculars and cigarettes that need to be smoked, the thing is, I read really boring-ass shit all day until my eyeballs feel like the Sahara desert. I have even developed a "benign growth of the conjunctiva" which means that I'm some sort of a vampire because it presumably comes from too much sunlight, although I know damn well comes from reading about electrostatic precipitators in eight hour stretches.

Fucking eye growths. What did I do to deserve this? My dad had one too and eventually he had to get it removed. If you guys knew how I felt about getting shots or even stepping foot in a hospital to visit someone, you might be able to deduce how I might feel about someone holding back my eyelids with clamps and poking at my eyeball with scalpels and shit.

Besides that, I´m supposed to be learning how to edit professionally (and I have a long damn way to go), since in one year´s time I have to take an exam in order to keep my position at work and apparently, oops, I need to learn French within that year too, because the goddamn exam is in French. Don´t ask me how an exam for an English proofreader in Spain can be in French cause I haven´t got the foggiest idea. But apparently I need to figure this shit out or my career is going to turn into trace gas and my income is going to become nanomaterial. (Did you just hear that? Did I just say career? It may be the first time in my life I´ve thought in those terms.) Does anyone know how the eff I´m supposed to learn French while living in Spain, with a full time job and blogs to read and neighbors that need to be spied on with vampire eyes that need to be dealt with?

So I´ve neglected you a lot. And I don´t read books anymore or newspapers and my brain is going to expire soon and start rotting if I don´t start inputting and outputting some goodness.

I´m making an effort. But I always thought you deserved more than my crossed out and haphazardly scribbled brain upchucks and so I stay silent for ages. Why do I want to dazzle you so? Maybe because I like you a whole lot. This rut, it's hard to get out of and the only way I can do it is by posting words I haven't previously massaged and french kissed and marinated in butter overnight (I said something along those lines when I started this blog, but this time it´s fer reals and I might even post a bullet point list next of shit in my closet, or shit that my neighbors are doing, even though you deserve much better).

So there.

Because it makes me happy to just talk to you.






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jen February 5, 2010 at 10:49 AM  

how did the musician get to carnegie hall? practice, practice, practice.

trite but true. writing and reading and studying are all skills that need practice to become proficient at.

but the best part is that practice is, by its very nature, expected to be imperfect - so don't hold out on writing (or reading, or studying), thinking we want perfection.

the internet loves you *precisely because* you are imperfect.

People in the Sun February 5, 2010 at 11:30 AM  

That is a strange one. The exam being in French, I mean. And also the fact that doctors in Spain use shit to cure eye problem. That's also strange. (Or maybe I'm just being ethnocentric?)

Yo Momma February 5, 2010 at 11:55 AM  

Why is it in French? Good gravy. Okay so I guess you need to get Rosetta Stone? That shit is expensive but apparently you can learn a whole other language over breakfast!

Glad to have you back! I wuvs you back! :P

karey m. February 5, 2010 at 12:36 PM  

anytime, friend. anytime.

i missed your writing. i've been looking at pretty pictures for too long, you know?

was craving some words. thanks for these.

Tobi February 5, 2010 at 4:29 PM  

Let’s smoke and spy and bathe your drippy eyes in something (I’m not sure what) and worry about all that French stuff later, want to?
I am very not helpful, I know, I am just happy you are speaking to me here again.

Pueblo girl February 5, 2010 at 5:09 PM  

The new obsession is awesome - well the website is. It's not there now for me, I'd need software to take photos of the memories.

flutter February 5, 2010 at 5:46 PM  

You. Complete. Me.

Here In Franklin February 5, 2010 at 5:59 PM  

Blues...for years I was the person who never took a camera on vacation. But before we went to Japan, all of a sudden I wanted a camera...I didn't want to rely on my husband for photos. He has a really fancy camera and takes lovely shots. I have a relatively inexpensive one that I love. I'll never be a photographer, but now I'm sorry for all the trips I took without a camera.

Ellie February 5, 2010 at 8:05 PM  

And, man, do we love you too!

Captain Steve February 8, 2010 at 7:52 AM  

Awww, that's so sweet! Good luck with the french, dude. I'm still mixing up the spanish I'm learning with the french I didn't know I remembered from high school.

formerly fun February 8, 2010 at 9:03 AM  

Well, of course, the answer is so simple or shall I say, Il est si simple!

Get a sexy French tutor(sorry sexy Spaniard husband)not so you'll be bad only so you will be properly motivated to learn.

Oh Bleu, vous êtes aussi sexy que vous êtes futé

It might help you learn if he is mildly interested in you so go buy some shoes that feel dangerous.

I am fairly certain that this is the best way to pass your test.

A Free Man February 11, 2010 at 4:35 PM  

Right back atcha. I happen to know that you've been quite busy in other corners of the internet, however. What, with chasing down lazy authors and all...

My Way February 22, 2010 at 10:41 PM  


Gwen February 25, 2010 at 5:31 AM  

I've been in a similar boat. Just in a blog rut made worse by the reality of a difficult pregnancy and birth and now babies wah-wahing and full of need. But I MISS my blog reality and all my blog friends, including you.

I'm glad we're back :)

Good luck with learning French and passing the test and all that.

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